Yesterday I explained to a young Mom that her intention to be a good parent, and all the time and attention she pours into her baby is filling her baby up, and will always be there for her baby-to be drawn upon in the future. As I spoke to her I had a “flash” of memory of all the help I had when my twin boys were born: how my sister and her family came and stayed to help take care of Rachel during their birth and the first days, how my in-parents stayed for two weeks, my parents stayed for two weeks, and how everyone pitched in to “fill” the babies, to meet their needs. I am filled with gratitude for those gifts, and the realization that these young people grew up to be solid young adults in part because their needs were met in their infancy, with the help of my “village”.

It was not easy: I had to let go of the idea that I could do it all. I had to let go of the idea that if I made a mistake people would think I was a terrible mother, and that would be terrible. I had to let go of the idea that it was “asking too much” to let others pitch in. I ┬áhad to let go of the idea that if I let someone pitch in, I had to “pay back” as much or more, and soon. I let go, and my babies were filled up. And So Was I.